Kate Bornstein Is A Queer and Pleasant Danger—this is her blog

Up to Date with Auntie Kate, January 2016

Dear fabulous you,

I’ve been pretty quiet on social media for some time now, and I’ve so much news to tell!!

First off, I’m alive and well. And three years ago I wasn’t sure I’d make it to see 2016. But after two rounds of chemotherapy and radiation, I’m cancer-free now for just over two years! That’s two more years of life than I thought I was going to have. So, huge thank you’s to the thousands of people who contributed to my healthcare crowdsourcing campaign, back in 2012.

In gratitude, I’ve aimed to make this extra alive-time of mine count by focusing on 1) fun things to do that 2) help put an end to suffering for all sentient beings. Here’s what I've got cooking: 

• A brand-new edition of my first book, Gender Outlaw
• My first-ever theatrical tour of England
• My first-ever day-long gender workshop
• AND I’m gonna reveal some details of my recent secret adventures

I’ll be posting more about all of this over the next couple of days—please come back to see!

big love to you, deep respect for you, and a happy new year to all of us

Auntie Kate

Where's Kate in January-February?

I'm so glad to be out on the road again with some old favorite performances and workshops, as well as some brand new material. I'll be blogging soon about what exactly I'm up to—but here are some dates for now. I hope I get to see you at one of these gigs—if so, please do say hello! xoxo Auntie Kate

 

JANUARY APPEARANCES: 

 

January 10 Sunday matinee New York City: MDLSX, By Motus, Performed by Silvia Calderoni. I’m speaking on a talkback panel after the performance http://lamama.org/mdlsx/

 

January 15 Friday evening, New York City: SQUIRTS at La MaMa. I’m onstage with Miz June and PWR BTTM, one time only! http://lamama.org/squirts-2016/

 

January 30, Saturday evening, Hartford, CT: "TRANS, Beyond the Tipping Point" at Real Art Ways, co-presented with Mark Twain House. http://www.realartways.org/event/trans-beyond-the-tipping-point-an-evening-with-kate-bornstein/2016-01-30/

 

FEBRUARY ENGLAND TOUR:

 

February 5, Friday evening, Manchester, Queer Contact Festival at Contact Theater. Performance: “On Men, Women, and the Rest of Us.” http://contactmcr.com/whats-on/46295-qc16-kate-bornstein-on-men-women-and-the-rest-of-us/

 

February 6, Saturday all day workshop, Manchester, Queer Contact Festival at LGBT Foundation. MY GENDER WORKSHOP, http://contactmcr.com/whats-on/48492-qc16-kate-bornstein-my-gender-workshop/

 

SOLD OUT February 9, Tuesday evening, London, The British Library. Kate Bornstein In Conversation With Paris Lees. http://www.bl.uk/events/kate-bornstein-in-conversation

 

SOLD OUT February 13, Saturday all day workshop, London, MY GENDER WORKSHOP. https://www.facebook.com/events/1493628694277011/. For more info and booking, email zed at queerhearted dot com.

 

February 18, Thursday evening, Brighton, at Dome Studio Theatre, Performance: “On Men, Women, and the Rest of Us.” http://brightondome.org/event/8775/on_men_women_and_the_rest_of_us/

 

February 19, Friday afternoon workshop, Brighton, location tba. “Hello Cruel World: Survival Tips for Trans & GNC Youth"

 

February 20, Saturday night, London, at Duckie! In cabaret with Sooze Frumin and Dame Poppycock. http://www.duckie.co.uk/saturdays/page/2

 

February 21, Sunday evening, London: Benefit screening of Sam Feder’s documentary film, “Kate Bornstein Is A Queer and Pleasant Danger,” — details TBA

 

February 23-24 Tuesday-Wednesday evenings, London, at SoHo Theatre: Performance: “On Men, Women, and the Rest of Us.” http://sohotheatre.com/whats-on/kate-bornstein-on-men-women-and-the-rest-of-us/

 

February 26 Friday evening, London, Wheatsheaf Hall, a LoveSpirit event with Barbara Carrellas and me: "Our Journeys in Sex, Gender and Spirit.” Tickets and details: click here.

 

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MARCH, APRIL, MAY and JUNE BOOKINGS ARE IN THE WORKS

 

Please contact Jean at SpeakOutNow to bring me to a campus, town, or theater near you!

Lambda Literary Pioneer Award Talks, 2014

First, here's a video (shot by audience member, Jim Fouratt) of Barbara Carrellas presenting & Kate Bornstein accepting the 2014 Lambda Literary Award. The text of both their remarks follows.

 

Barbara Carrellas Remarks,
Presenting Lambda Literary Pioneer Award to Kate Bornstein

Imagine with me, please. Imagine a place that is not here and a time that is before now. Imagine a gathering of ancient bodiless souls, all drinking tea and deciding the social priorities for the 20th Century. One gay soul suddenly turns serious. “I am calling for us as a soul group to congregate in the United States in the mid-20th century. Our time on earth will be short. Almost all of us will have died of a plague they will call AIDS before the millennium. Our task? To love and care and fight for each other so fiercely, to become so strong and so visible, that gay men and lesbians in a large portion of the world will have equal rights shortly after our deaths.

     There are gasps of awe and enthusiastic shouts of agreement. “Count me in! Me, too! Me, three!” When the cacophony dies down, one lone, lovely creature speaks “That is wonderful but, it’s not enough. What about everyone who doesn’t fit into the binary of gay or lesbian? Or man or woman? What about every sexual outlaw and freak of gender? Who’s gonna fight for their rights?”

     The thoughtful soul who had proposed AIDS to the group, says, “You’re right. But I don’t see how we can do it all in one go.” “Ah, but I do,” says the lovely one. “I’ll go down with you, but I’ll take another path while you take on AIDS. By the time you’ve finished, I’ll be ready. I need the time, anyway. I have research to do. I’ve been thinking that most of earth’s problems are caused by gender. Gender on earth operates like a evil cult. I need time to explore the nature of cults. I heard yesterday that someone is creating a new cult. I think they are calling it Scientology. I think I’ll check it out.”

     The lovely loner was not alone for long. Many in the AIDS soul group were so taken with the Gender Project that they volunteered to jump back into new bodies right after their AIDS lifetimes. “Wait for us! We’ll be back to join you. You’ll recognize us. We’ll be the cute ones with great haircuts, unrecognizable gender presentations, and creative pronouns. But we’ll need to be caught up to speed quickly. Write us some books we can read while we’re growing up. Books that will help us keep ourselves safe and prepare us to fight for the new gender revolution.”

     And thus it was decided. 

     Albert Bornstein was born in 1948. He joined the Church of Scientology in 1970, and learned cults from the inside for 12 years. In 1986, Kate Bornstein was born.

     If you ask the question, as I recently did on Facebook and Twitter, “What does Kate Bornstein mean to you?” the overwhelmingly most popular answer is, “Kate Bornstein saved my life.” 

     As writers, we have all collectively and individually inspired lots of people. We’ve changed more than a few lives with the power of our words. But how many of us can say that our writing has saved thousands of lives? 

     It is my fiercest pleasure to present the Lambda Literary Foundation’s Pioneer Award to my beloved partner in life, love and art, Kate Bornstein.

*****

Kate Bornstein Pioneer Award Remarks, Lambda Literary 2014

Thank you Lambda Literary, for this wonderful moment of recognition. You are perfect dears to be doing this for me. 

OK—thank you to so many of you in this room. Last year—and again just over a month ago—over 3,000 people around the world joined together to raise more than $120,000 to help me get through cancer therapy, when I was too sick with side effects or recovering from surgeries, to go out on tour and earn my daily bread. What’s more—something I never thought would happen, but your gifts and well wishes completely crushed, once and for all, my low sense of self-esteem. You saved my life. You made me wanna stay alive. Bless your hearts.

Alright now-pioneering. Only a very few people do that solo. I sure didn’t. In the areas of gender identity and expression, I have many colleagues to thank—as well as writers I’ve followed, imitated, and stolen from. Their names will appear on my blog, but I do need to speak some names here, tonight. 

My path as a writer of books has been guided by remarkable publishing houses and editors: 

• Serpent Tail Press, Amy Scholder & Ira Sliverberg —  
• Routledge Press, Bill Germano — 
• Seven Stories Press, Crystal Yackaki & Amy Scholder — 
• T Cooper for Akashic Books, — 
• Tristan Taormino for Cleis Press,— 
• Seal Press, Brooke Warner — 
• Beacon Press, Gayatri Patnaik— 
• and Routledge Press again, Erica Wetter. 
• Love and thanks Caitlin Sullivan, co-author of Nearly Roadkill. 
• Love and thanks to S. Bear Bergman, outstanding co-editor of Lammy award winning Gender Outlaws the Next Generation. 
• Thanks to my tour agent, Jean Caiani at SpeakOut. 
• Thank you Gail Leondar-Wright, for the publicity that first ever got Gender Outlaw out into the world. 
• I’m forever grateful to my literary agent—I love you, Malaga Baldi. 
• My friend and mentor for over 40 years is John Emigh—he’s always pushed me into writing what’s most scary to write about.

Finally, the editor who has been looking at all my words for 17 years now is my bubu, my muse, and my dear imzadi, Barbara Carrellas. When we were both souls outside of time and space, and we were deciding our rebirths: what could we do to ease the suffering of queer people? Well, it was Barbara who decided to make it her life’s mission to pioneer ecstatic sex that wouldn’t spread the plague. Thank you, bubu. You’ve brought ecstasy into my life and into the lives of all my kids—and you’ve always been there as an emergency power source all those times when I was nearly a goner. Love you, Miss Barbara.

*******

We live in interesting times. For the first time since anything trans has come to public awareness on this planet, the face of transgender belongs to a woman of color, Laverne Cox. The literary face of trans belongs to a woman of color, Janet Mock. And the pop culture face of trans belongs to a tranny of color, RuPaul.

Interesting times, indeed. For the first time ever, there are three generations of sex-and-gender theorists, artists, and activists, all alive at the same time—each generation has its unique point of view, each with unique experiences and timeline. 

I’m asking that we three generations of sex and gender artists, activists, theorists, and spiritual leaders come together in a pioneer coalition that deals with race and class within our community—for starters. I want we three generations of LGBTQetc to welcome family living beyond those letters, for we are legion.

Our legion of identities has the common denominators of sexuality, sex, gender identity, and gender expression. But because we live in a culture founded by Puritans, it’s shameful to talk about sex and gender. Nevertheless, all of us are here tonight because of terrific sex and/or fabulous gender. Now, Puritanical sex-negativity shames us into invisibilizing our terrific sex and our fabulous genders. And sadly, institutionalized sex-negativity extends into our own community. We shame each other. We’re being mean to each other. We have got to stop shaming, and distancing ourselves from sissies, sex workers, BDSMers, pornographers, sluts, burlesque artists, trannies and drag queens. These are the funnest people in our family—shaming these people and distancing ourselves from them is mean. It’s a Puritanically-generated mix of misogyny, homophobia, and transphobia. I’m asking you as your old Auntie: please stop doing that. Someone, pioneer a queer community that doesn't eat its own… please. 

In this spirit of inclusivity, Dear Lambda Literary people, may I be so bold as to tickle your own fabulous pioneering spirit? Please, Lambda Lit, create award categories for sex education, queer Young Adult fiction, queer spirituality, and one more category for books written by people with sex and gender identities not yet expressed by LGBT.

OK, I’m wrapping up now. Here’s the deal: I’ve got lung cancer and leukemia. I know, I know I might be around for another 15 or 20 years, but just in case I’m not, I wanna say this now: Please, my darlings, all of you, take care of each other. Watch each other’s back. Stand up for each other. Please.

Now, go sissy your walk, children. Please, stay alive. Have good sex, have fun with gender, and write great stuff about that.

Auntie loves you. 

Kiss Kiss

The Cat Came Back

Hello, Dear Heart

My lung cancer is back—not in my lung, but in some lymph node. Here comes surgery, chemo, and radiation again. Now, kindly allow me to put this in a perspective and context that I promise is NOT scary. Really, I’m doing super well with this, and I’ve got a lot to tell you that I’m finding out, so please hang in here with me. Trust me, I’m The Auntie.

Right, history first: I was first diagnosed with lung cancer on September 24, 2012. I had surgery to remove the upper lobe of my right lung. The surgical team tried real hard, but they didn’t get it all. Normally, I would’ve gone straight on to chemo and radiation. But a big deal medical oncologist determined that there was no chemo that would work on me. If I wanted to live, he told me, it had to be by radiation alone. To be fair, the doctor was confronted by a challenge in me. I’ve got a whacky health status and, an immune system compromised by chronic lymphocytic leukemia that was first diagnosed in 1996. Plus, I’ve got a body grown on testosterone, that’s now running on estrogen. Genital conversion surgery aside, I’m minus a gall bladder, half a liver, and 12 inches of intestine. I’ve got cervical dystonia and scoliosis. I’m a rambling wreck! And, hello… I’m OLD! (Oh yes, I am. More on that later.) But y’know what the last straw was—the final thing about me that would bar me from all approved chemo regimens? Tinnitus. All my life, I’ve had a ringing in my ears. I didn’t learn until high school that I was the only one hearing all those mad bells and buzzers. I thought you heard them, too… all the time, like me. Well, tinnitus is a common side-effect of most chemo, and what it could do to me was make me deaf, and maybe even kill me. Like in Buffy or Haven, blood would leak out of my ears and I’d die, that’s what he implied anyway. Yes, honey, I do tend to exaggerate, but truly: it was the ringing in my ears when the big deal medical oncologist threw up his hands and, with a look of pity, handed me over to the radiologist.

My girlfriend and I did a lot a research—friends gave us terrific advice for alternative treatments. Through my touring work and book income, I’ve been able to pay for insurance that covered me fairly well for medicorp-government-approved procedures. But I had insufficient money to cover any forms of treatment outside the approved regimens—not to mention the cost of living while getting those treatments. That’s when my miracle happened. That’s when some friends came to my side. Thousands and thousands of friends and family came to my side. Maybe one was you—maybe you sent me money and/or you sent me love. One week of crowd-sourcing raised me over $100,000. Thousands of you. Thousands of people told me they love me. Can you imagine what a lasting blow that was to my low self-esteem?!

Well, the money raised covered it all. Thank you. Acting on the advice of Kris Carr, I found a clinic in Chicago where the doctors did their homework and found a chemo treatment that had just passed a stage two clinical trial. I began chemo on my birthday, March 15 2013, and I continued to travel to Chicago every three weeks through June. At the same time, I received 33 days of radiation, here in New York City. And it all worked. The cancer was gone, and it had been a year to the day since I was first diagnosed. Such relief and joy!! I had six amazing cancer-free months, during which I got back out on the road for some unforgettably wonderful engagements. What’s more, I’ve had the time and circumstances and good health to begin a novella—a book I’m writing just for the love of writing it. It’s delightful fiction that I’ve been wanting to write now for over a decade, but other books needed to come first. As of this past Christmas, I’d got through the first two chapters. Then, on December 30th, a PET CT revealed, and a fine-needle aspiration confirmed: yep, the lung cancer is back.

Darling, those were always the odds. That’s how cancer works. So now, I’m simply moving on with the next phase of living with cancer: more treatment. Treatment this time around begins with surgery at the end of January—then weekly chemo + daily radiation starting probably in the second week of February.
As to my touring schedule, I’m still working out my calendar with the doctors, but I’ve confirmed that I can do my week-long, six-city tour of Wisconsin, February 3-8. After that, I’ll do my very best to make all the gigs I’m already committed to. And for now, my booking calendar is closed for any new engagements before May or June. I hate to disappoint, and I thank you for your kind understanding.

Dear heart, please know I am dealing REALLY WELL with this. Of course I get scared, and I’ve named my fear as a realistic dread of the inevitably noxious side-effects of chemo and radiation. BUT… I’m not beating myself up for feeling scared, and I’m changing my perspective by reflecting on the delightful paradox: chemo and radiation are exactly what’s gonna let me live longer. Wanting to live longer is new for me. I’m not used to it. But I like it. Why do I wanna live longer? Well… for you. Truly. I so enjoy being your old auntie, and what’s an old auntie without her nieces and nephews?? So, fuck dread. And fuck cancer. I’m gonna write another non-fiction book about my life with cancer… I’ll get to that after I write my novella. See, now? I do plan to be around for awhile. That’ll get me two new books, and (lots) more time with you. I’m so looking forward to that. Thank you for your love.

Kiss kiss

Auntie Kate

 

Susie & Aretha Bright's Great Fucking Book

I tired posting this review to amazon.com but the internet machine got in the way of me posting it there. So I'm writing it here, because this is a great fucking book. I mean that in every great sense of the words.

Sex advice books can be problematic for many reasons and this book avoids most if not all of the common problems, and so it's a winner.First off, sex advice is generationally problematic. Old people and young people have different views of sex. Most times, these views conflict.

Mother/Daughter Sex Advice solves this problem neatly by making all the advice an intergenerational conversation. How cool is that?!

Many sex advice books are limited in their scope of what sex means. Both Aretha and Susie are far beyond limits when it comes to sex. No matter your gender or sexuality, if it turns you on—or if you thought it might turn you on—it's probably in this book. I read with joy as all sorts of wonderful topics were playfully and intelligently discussed: erectile dysfunction, body image, even the taste of semen--and so much more--are all discussed with flair, gentle good humor and kindness by the two authors. The book never gets bogged down in serious discussions of sex, using long words. At several points in the read, I found myself laughing out loud. Now that's how to talk about sex!

And because the book is written as a conversation, the reader never feels targeted or spoken at. Instead, we are participants in a sweet, funny conversation between mom and daughter. In short it's everything your mom never told you about sex, and everything your daughter will never tell you about sex.

Maybe you've read my book, Hello Cruel World—it's about how to make yourself a life more worth living. Well, great sex is a great way to make life more worth living, and if you liked my book, you're gonna love this one. It's a sex advice book for the rest of us, whether we're a mom, a daughter, or both--whether we're a father, a son, or any combination of the above. Highly recommended.

Currently, the book is available for Kindle, and you can get your copy right here. Have fun with it. I did!

A Queer and Pleasant Danger — any minute now!

My memoir hits the shelves on Tuesday, May 1st, and I am SO DARNED EXCITED FOR YOU TO READ THIS BOOK! Before I sat down to write the first draft, I got myself a tattoo on the back of my left hand. It says "I must not tell lies." So, A Queer and Pleasant Danger is the truth of me. It's not theory or stagecraft, it's just me. The book is dedicated to my daughter and grandchildren—all of whom are currently members in good standing of the Church of Scientology. Since I've been excommunicated from that cult/religion, no one who's a Scientologist in good standing with the established church is allowed to speak with me.

So, that makes this book the biggest truth of me I've ever written—in hopes that my daughter and grandchildren may one day break free and have a look. But you can read it, too. If you're reading this blog, you're interested in me and/or my work, and for that I'm grateful. Well, this memoir will give you a better look at the roots of all my academic and political words. I hope it makes you laugh. And I 'm sorry—really I am—but parts of the story will likely make you cry. I try to make up for that with pages that leave you gasping out loud.

Thank you for reading me. You can buy the book NOW from from: your friendly local Independent Bookstore, Amazon, Barnes and Noble, and Powells.

kiss kiss,

Kate

Quotes

"A Queer and Pleasant Danger is a brave, funny, edgy, and enlightening new memoir. I loved it and learned from it. Kate Bornstein shares her fascinating journey—through gender, Scientology, and more—and it was a thrill to tag along on the ride. This book is unbelievably powerful and affecting. If Kate Bornstein didn't exist, we would have to invent her. But luckily for queers, straights, gender outlaws, and general readers, Bornstein is out and out there."

— Dan Savage, author, columnist, and architect of the "It Gets Better Project" 

“I read A Queer and Pleasant Danger over four nights in a bathtub and bed and was totally transported to Kate Bornstein’s world. Kate boldly lets us look under the hood of her own transformations as Jew, Scientologist, boy, girl, Buddhist and parent, leaving us with a richer understanding of the true identity underneath: human. A Queer and Pleasant Danger is a page turner, making sweet love to the paradoxes we all face."

— Amanda Palmer, musician and co-founder of The Dresden Dolls

"To me, Kate Bornstein is like a mythological figure or a historical literary character such as Orlando or Candide who, by illustrating her struggles, shows the rest of us how to live. This book is destined to become a classic."

— Mx Justin Vivian Bond, author of Tango: My Childhood, Backwards and in High Heels 

"Kate Bornstein's journey from moon-eyed Scientologist to queer icon is harrowing, heartbreaking, and amazing. This narrative is surely not for the squeamish. And yet, in the story of a sea-dog named Al who became a trans goddess named Kate, we see the messy, unsettling, inspiring struggle of a lady trying—and at last succeeding—to let her own soul be known. Disturbing and wondrous."

— Jennifer Finney Boylan, author of She's Not There and I'm Looking Through You 

-----------------

So, it's exciting! And, one more time: you can buy the book NOW from from: your friendly local Independent Bookstore, Amazon, Barnes and Noble, and Powells.

Contact Beacon Press for a review copy, or to arrange an interview with YOU and ME! 

Got Ecstasy?

No, not the party drug. I'm talking about the real deal: that great big whoopee. Have you got some of that? Have you ever had some of that? Want some? Oh, do read on.

I’m thrilled to kick off the blog tour for the new book by Barbara Carrellas: Ecstasy Is Necessary: a practical guide. This is an awesome book—one of those must-have manuals for making our lives more worth living. It may come as a surprise to some that Ecstasy Is Necessary is not a book about sex. Rather, it's a book that pulls back the curtain behind sex—and gives us a peek at why sex is such a big deal. Ecstasy Is Necessary is a book about why there are so many different ways we choose to do or not do sex.

People are going to be looking at this book from many different perspectives, and I think it’s fair that you know more about the person who wrote it and why you can trust her. Full disclosure: Miss Barbara is my girlfriend, my art partner, the love of my life and my BFF. August 2012 marks our 15th anniversary. Barbara and I are objects in space, locked into each other’s gravitational field, so I know a lot about this woman and what she’s capable of.

 Here’s how I look at my girlfriend’s book:

It starts off with a gutsy-as-all-hell title. Ecstasy is necessary? Yep. And this is indeed a practical guide. The book, after all, comes out from Hay House Publishing—the awesome international self-help publishing company founded by Louise Hay, a woman who has saved countless lives. Her gabillion-selling book, You Can Heal Your Life provided much comfort to many gay men at the height of the AIDS epidemic in the USA. The life-saving miracles that Louise Hay accomplished on a spiritual/psychic level, Barbara regularly accomplishes today on a spiritual/body level.

At the same time Louise Hay was working her magic in the 1980’s, Barbara Carrellas was a Broadway baby—a general manager in the New York City theater scene. The height of the AIDS epidemic was a hard time for her—she was losing up to four dear friends a week. Barbara was heart-broken. She joined the New York Healing Circle to help teach people with AIDS how to have great safer sex. That's where she became fast friends with sexpert pioneers, Joseph Kramer and Annie Sprinkle. Not that Barbara was a stranger to sex. It's not my place to give you details, but don't worry—Barbara doesn't spare details of her personal sex life stories in the book. Goodness gracious, they're delicious.

Barbara Carrellas' unique sexual orientation has always been an inspiration to me. Barbara has sex in order to experience a connection with the goddess—the earth—the cosmos—whatever you want to call the great big good. Sex for Barbara is a doorway to the ecstasy you see in the faces of the saints—in those early paintings of their moment of connection with God. That kind of ecstasy. Want some for yourself? Me too. So, let’s jump to the sub-title of the book: a practical guide. 

Barbara Carrellas is a skilled guide and workshop leader who’s developed techniques by which anyone who wants to can achieve ecstasy. Her book is a step-by-step exploration of the unique ecstatic frontiers of our lives. Yes, that discovery might be made through sex and erotic energy, but not necessarily. Carrellas posits that often the road to ecstasy lies in the direction of the more risky areas of our lives, whatever those may be. The following ten steps are section headings in the chapter, “Erotic Risk-Taking: Playing With Fire:”

Erotic Risk-Taking in Ten Simple Steps

1. Find your turn-on.
2. Consider the risk.
3. Make a commitment.
4. Find support.
5. Enjoy the anticipation.
6. Jump into the water.
7. Release the need to be perfect.
8. Rest and regroup.
9. Try, try again… or don’t.
10. Surrender and enjoy.

How’s your risk-taking been lately, anyway? Barbara writes pages about each step, but I bet you could put this list to use today in some fashion. I can tell you that since I read this section of the book, I can't imagine taking a risk—erotic or otherwise—without taking all of these steps.

Ecstasy Is Necessary takes woo-woo to hitherto unexplored edges. Barbara follows her own advice about risk taking, and she tells us some hair raising stories: from braving her extreme claustrophobia by climbing into an FMRI machine to measure her brain waves during a breath-and-energy orgasm (commonly referred to as “thinking off”)—to taking a class in branding with the legendary Fakir Musafar. Yes, branding—like hot metal to the skin, sizzle sizzle. Thankfully, Barbara is such a talented and good-hearted writer, she makes that story easy to read. Nevertheless, it may be a challenge for you to read and put this book to use in your life. Ecstasy always is challenging. So please, ask yourself...

Have you ever had a moment of ecstasy?

If so, would you like to regularly re-create that moment?

If not, would you like to find out what the big deal is all about?

In closing, allow me please to say that if you’re reading this, you're most likely already some sort of sex and gender explorer. Or maybe you’re an artist—or you're a nerd. Maybe you're little or a lot crazy, and your craziness is your greatest superpower. Or you're some combination of all of the above. In any case, you’re my people. Well, Barbara wrote this book for us. It’s one thing to explore and acknowledge our identities—it’s quite another to understand that who we are is precisely how we can live ecstatic lives. That’s what Ecstasy Is Necessary is going to help you discover—I promise. Buy Barbara Carrellas' new book, and find yourself some ecstasy. I bet you need it. I know you deserve it. 

kiss kiss,

Kate Bornstein

PS: Almost forgot to tell you! Got any questions or comments? Barbara will be available to respond to you in the comments section here on Thursday March 1st. xoxo K

 

Please Help Me Update My Gender Workbook

Dear Hearts,

I’m thrilled to write that I’ve been asked by Routledge Publishing to update my fifteen year old book, My Gender Workbook. We struck a deal, I’ve got the green light, and I’ve begun writing My New Gender Workbook. I’m so excited!

WHY AN UPDATE?

I’ve been in touch via Twitter, my blog, and YouTube with a lot of people who regularly read and use My Gender Workbook both in class and daily in their lives. It turns out that people really like the principles of the book—but that many of the cultural references and contexts—even the way some quiz questions are phrased—are out of date, and this sometimes gets in the way of grasping the important stuff. So, an update would involve a page by page combing out of outdated references. For example…

• There’s much more awareness of intersections of oppression and marginalization.
• There’s a much more sophisticated understanding of & experience with the Internet.
• The geopolitical world has grown vastly more polarized since the book came out.
• In a few places in the world, reat strides have been made in sex-and-gender freedoms.
• At the same time, many ghastly practices of policing sex and gender have been uncovered.
• Sex-and-gender activism has become globalized, and shuffled into the deck of social activism.
• Young Female-to-Male has replaced Middle-Aged Male-to-Female as the face of transgender in the world.
• Sex and Gender activism & awareness has become increasingly polarized along lines of class, race, and age.

WHERE DO YOU COME IN?

As in the original book, I’ll be looking for a great many voices other than my own. In the original, there were hundreds of voices other than mine, appearing in lists, text boxes and call-outs.  In the new version, I’m aiming to include even more voices. My idea is to maintain a running commentary of multiple voices all through the book. 

SUBMISSION GUIDELINES

All submissions for the workbook should be in the form of tweets, or at most double tweets—that is to say, all submission should be no longer than 140 to 280 characters, including the mandatory hashtag: #MNGW (My New Gender Workbook). Why so short? The very best voices in the original workbook were short, articulate, and right to the point. 

SO—WHAT DO YOU WRITE ABOUT?

Any gender-related topic you damned please.

However, over the course of the next 4-6 weeks, I’ll be asking specific questions on this blog and on Twitter. There’s going to be a new question every couple of days. But you don't have to wait for the questions. If you’ve got anything to say in 140-280 characters, I WANT TO READ IT, and I promise I will.

HOW DO YOU SEND IN YOUR SUBMISSION?

The best way is to use Twitter. Remember, two tweets maximum. All submission tweets must include the hashtag #MNGW or they very likely will slip through the cracks and we most certainly do not want that!

You can also post your answer on this blog. If you do, make sure you give us a way to reach you if we need to. 

Or, you can email your submission to: mynewgenderworkbook at gmail dot com. 

Please note that we will use no one’s words without their express permission. 

Finally, there's no promise that your name will appear next to your words, or that your words will be used. Everyone whose words are used will be credited with the name of your choosing in the acknowledgements.

There’s only one more rule for submissions: don’t be mean. 

ENOUGH ALREADY—HERE’S THE FIRST QUESTION

What’s your gender?

 ____

I cannot WAIT to see your kickass smart answers to this simple li'l question.

Please do retweet and repost and link to this blog to as many places as you can—even the surprising places.

Thank you in advance for all your help and support.

Big love,

Auntie Kate

 

 

 

Hello, Cruel App! Yes! On yer iPhone or iPad!

Hello, Cruel World is currently back on the shelves in its 4th printing, widely available in bookstores... AND NOW it's also a shiny new app for the iPhone and iPad. I am so excited, I can't see straight.

Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

Thanks to the awesome persistence of the loverly coders at Apollic Software, led by Daniel Siders. And thanks to my dear publisher, Seven Stories Press.

Here are just a few of the features you get for your US$ 2.99:

• All 101 alternatives to suicide for teens, freaks, and other outlaws, laid out in nifty scroll-through cards with fun illustrations.
• Super smooth, intuitive interface.
• Easy choice of alternatives as rated by effectiveness, ease, and degree of safety/danger.
• Awesome selection of alternatives by cloud.
• Easily tag alternatives as your favorites.
• Live link to the hashtag stayalive on Twitter.
• The ability to email a Get Out of Hell Free card to anyone you like!
• A list of actions you can take if you need help NOW to stay alive.

Check out some dee-lish screen shots:

I am thrilled beyond words, so I'll stop using words and just point you to the link so you can go see it for yourself:

HELLO, CRUEL WORLD APP for iPhone & iPad

(future versions of the app will be available on other platforms)

Love you to pieces, so please stay alive.

Auntie Kate

The Great "Gender Outlaws TNG" Blog Tour

 I'm going out on tour, and I'm not leaving the comfort of my writing chair. You can come along too!

The reviews are coming in on Gender Outlaws: The Next Generation: one a day for the next nine days. Seal Press is the publisher of the new anthology. Their slogan is Groundbreaking Books, By Women, For Women. Well, they're stretching that slogan all out of shape. They came up with the fun idea to arrange for a tour of reviews from nine different corners of the feminist/trans/trans-friendly/and genderqueer blogosphere.

I've already had a chance to read the first posted review today. It's by Everett Maroon, and it's up on I Fry Mine in Butter. No puff journalism, this. It's a wonderful essay. I've posted a comment to the blog, and I hope to read and comment on each of the reviews as they're posted. 

(Oh! I'm enjoying this almost as much as I enjoyed working with S. Bear Bergman and Seal Press to put this anthology together in the first place!)

So, here's the rest of the schedule. Enjoy the perspectives!

• Tuesday, Sept 28 -  Rose Spotts posts on Twisted Peppermint.
• Wednesday, Sept 29 -  R. J. posts a comic review on Riot Nrrd Comics.
• Thursday, Sept 30  -  Jamie Ann Royce posts on Stuff Queer People Should Know
• Friday, Oct 1 – Hannah Royce posts on Walking the Labrynth

We take the weekend off, and continue the following Monday.

• Monday, Oct 4 – Zane McHattie posts on ED Recovery
• Tuesday, 10/5 – Nome posts on That’s What Ze Said
• Wednesday, 10/6 – Jac Stringer posts on MWgenderqueer

and we close our blogging tour of GO The Next Generation with...

• Thursday, 10/7 – Bevin Branlandingham posting on Queer Fat Femme Guide to Life

AND...

• Friday, 10/8 – Mr. Sinclair Sexsmith posting on SugarButch!

I'll be tweeting each stop on the tour as it goes up. So... enjoy the next couple of weeks of binary-blowing gendernalysis. And please do join in the conversation along your way with comments on each of the reviews, and right here if you like. I am SO all aquiver!

kiss kiss

Auntie K